Practicing Medicine

Sometimes, people say what they truly mean when they’re upset, and those moments can hit harder than any physical pain. Today, I learned that in the most painful way imaginable.

It started as a simple disagreement, the kind of everyday conflict that shouldn’t have left a lasting mark. I voiced my opinion about something trivial, and then it happened. Someone within my inner circle—someone I trusted—blurted out, “That’s why you have cancer!” I froze. Time seemed to stop as those words echoed in my mind, over and over again. How could someone say something so cruel? How could they weaponize my illness, my reality, in the heat of an argument? Cancer is not a punishment. It’s not something I chose, nor is it something I deserve. Yet, in that moment, it felt like my entire existence had been reduced to a disease. A disease that someone used to justify their anger and, in doing so, questioned my humanity.

I didn’t lash out or respond in kind. I couldn’t. My mind was racing, my heart pounding, and a lump formed in my throat as tears burned the edges of my eyes. What hurt the most wasn’t just the words themselves, but the fact that they came from someone so close to me. Someone I thought understood the depth of what I’ve been going through. It’s not easy being vulnerable in front of others. It takes courage to share your pain, your struggles, and your fears. To have that thrown back at you in such a hateful way feels like betrayal on the deepest level.

Later, I sat alone, trying to process everything. I thought about forgiveness—how people say hurtful things they don’t mean in the heat of the moment. But I also thought about boundaries and how important it is to protect myself, emotionally and mentally, during this journey. My energy is limited, and I’ve learned that not everyone deserves access to it, especially if they can’t support me with kindness and empathy.

To anyone reading this who has been hurt by words, let me say this: your pain is valid. People may apologize, and you may forgive, but it’s okay to take time to heal. It’s okay to step back and demand better from the people around you. This journey is hard enough without the added weight of others’ insensitivity. Cancer may change your body, your schedule, and even your outlook on life, but it does not define who you are or what you’re worth. Today was a hard day, but it was also a reminder to protect my peace and prioritize the relationships that uplift me, not tear me down. As for the person who said those words? I don’t know what the future holds for that relationship, but for now, I need space to heal—not just from cancer, but from wounds inflicted by thoughtless words.